Monday, August 24, 2015

Up Your Nose With a... Wait, That's Doesn't Rhyme

Everyone's favorite criminal mastermind finally popped his pointy head up today with an update to the backers of his late, lamented Pencil Dice kickstarter. Though the update was carefully restricted to backers only, you don't need to be one to see it because we've got all the goods right here. Starting with The Artist as a Dumb Man...


Okay, we memed that, but the runner-up in the Kingpin cosplay contest did actually shoot and post that picture as part of his kickstarter update. Seriously. In said update, the picture was followed by this exciting high-production video recorded on the best iPhone 6 plus your backer dollars could buy...


Finally, here's the whole thing including the meaningless Ken Whitman Lie boilerplate...

(click to enlarge, like Ken's belt size)
So what does this update mean in the grand scheme of things? Do seeing the same 7-8 sample pencil dice shown in both the picture and video mean backers can expect their months late shipment of thousands of pencil dice soon? Nope. For all anyone knows these are the same sample pencils Ken showed 6 months ago. Does it mean that Chessex signed the deal with Ken to bail Ken out and manufacture the Pencil Dice? Nope, though clearly Ken's use of the pronoun "we" is meant to imply as much. Does this update mean anything other than Ken decided to cloud the waters enough to take some of the pressure off his heinous hiney? Likely.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me for 46 updates, you must be Ken Whitman to even try that kind of crap.